To Solitude
You are my only friend I’ve come to deeply know.
We are intimate together.
You’ve woven yourself into me,
And it feels impossible to let you go.
What is on the other side?
I am afraid to lose you.
You have become all I’ve known.
I’ve counted on you.
I've relied on you
In order to heal my heart,
And avoid it being crushed again.
Should I allow myself to move beyond our intimacy,
No longer in solitude?
What is there? Will there be more?
Will there be someone waiting at my door?
What’s available here in this portal
Where souls meet and intimately dance
In the interwoven webs of our lives?
I don’t know anymore.
Solitude, I love you.
You have shown me so much about myself—
What it means to be in this brown feminine vessel.
Will I ever get to be as intimate again with anything more?
It feels impossible to leave.
I don’t want to let you go.
From Solitude
Oh, sweet love. I will always be here with you,
With my love, warm hugs, and welcoming embrace.
But it’s time for you to go on now, my dear one.
You do not have to let me go,
But I invite you to move forward.
Welcome new energy.
Welcome love from another.
I will always be a part of you,
And you know you can always come back home to me,
In this place of Solitude.
It is within you and around you.
You can pause, drift in and out.
But I promise you, if you step away just for a moment,
You will dance so wildly, so lovingly, and so freely,
Because of your capacity to hold me,
And allow my medicine to transform you,
And those around you.
You are so very loved.
I am here. Do let go.
And know it is not impossible to come back home.
You can hold both the solitude and the room for more.
By Rosa Santoyo
Holy Lament Team member
IG: @somamoonsanctuary
